Is this the longest title in the history of titles? Maybe.
Anyway. The puppy.
It’s easy isn’t it? To judge. To be righteous. To assume you have more skill than someone else. That you were actually born a dog whisperer. Or a child whisperer for that matter, because we do it with parents of actual (rather than furry) children too.
‘Well if it was mine it wouldn’t be behaving like that, no no no..’
That was me.
I’m not proud of it, but it was.
It’s easy you see, to assess and criticize once things have gone wrong. It’s easy to say, ‘well you really shouldn’t be doing that, or oh gosh, you didn’t let it do THAT did you? Tut tut’
Yeah well, tell me. What DO you do when the back door is open but it decides to take a shit on the kitchen floor? Or when it knows it’s name and you call it and it looks at you. Just looks at you. Shouldn’t puppies want to be with you? And why are flower pots better than the £12.50 toy I spent hours choosing?
They say having a dog brings out the best in you. Well, I can’t say that for sure but I do know that he has taught me more in these last 2 weeks than any human ever has. I have been humbled beyond belief, confronted; what if I mess him up? and how is he so like me?! (not that I use the kitchen floor as my toilet you understand but more in the stubborn, independent sense), I have learnt tolerance and the incredible art of ‘letting it go’. Control freak? Me? Don’t think so pal. Not anymore.
Then there’s the poo. There’s a lot. And FYI, a bin full of puppy poo that has sat in 30 degree heat for 4 days makes you gag. More than once.
And poo bags. Well I don’t think the manufacturers of poo bags have ever dealt with poo. Not in the real sense of the word P.O.O. I mean, if they had they wouldn’t allow the business end of the bag to rip apart now would they? They wouldn’t bother making them out of thin material that splits as soon as it touches fresh air. Would they? Well friends, yes, yes they would. But tell me why would you go into the poo bag business if you had no desire to make an actual bag? If I wanted a fingerless glove I would’ve gone and got one.
And he is FAST. Like super fast. He gives a whole new meaning to Chicken Run I can tell you…that’s when he is hurtling towards someone else’s chickens. Yes. That happened. We did all survive but there was no offer of coffee.
But, and I am guessing it’s because he is so small that he has nestled into the chambers of my heart. It’s an overwhelming love; who knew you could love something so much that poops that much? That’s what animals do isn’t it? Teach us, all the time, open our hearts and make us better people.
The only thing I should’ve done? Should’ve got one years ago.